Frankly, the fact that I haven't won a medal for not killing someone disappoints me.

sparrow-and-nightingale-221b:

ughsos:

in elementary school i hit this kid cause he said i cant punch and i broke his nose and then my stepdad picked me up and the office was like “you have to say sorry” but then the kid was like “but she proved me wrong, she doesn’t have to say sorry” ladies and gentlemen my best friend of many many years

this is violently beautiful

(Source: calumswife, via wormstached-misha)

spermbanker:

seattle man. a local hero.

spermbanker:

seattle man. a local hero.

(via ghostinggirl)

Anonymous said: omg if baby oil dissolves condoms what the fuck does it do to babies???

the-kellin-under-the-vic:

This may be shocking, but babies and condoms are made of different material

blackout-escapist:

bagmilk:

*concerned white parent voice* sweetie don’t write on yourself you can get ink poisoning

image

(Source: heteroh, via whenthebluebellsareout)

proofmathisbeautiful:

I’m not even kidding guys…I already ordered 2!
A Multi-Function Clip That Hides a Toolbox In Your Hair
Andrew Liszewski
A Leatherman multi-tool hanging off your belt is a great way to stay prepared for emergencies, but it means you look like someone with a Leatherman hanging off their belt—and that part’s not so great. This innocuous hair clip is a better alternative. It manages to replicate the functionality of quite a few tools, but will all but disappear when used to keep your bangs at bay.
It can serve as a flat-head screwdriver, even for fixing those tiny screws on your glasses. It’s got a 5/16 wrench for tackling the occasional bolt, and there’s a serrated edge for hacking through rope, but hopefully not hacking through your hair when worn. It could very well be the smallest multi-tool you can buy for just $10, trumped only by the Q-Tip when it comes to cost versus functionality.

proofmathisbeautiful:

I’m not even kidding guys…I already ordered 2!

A Multi-Function Clip That Hides a Toolbox In Your Hair

Andrew Liszewski

A Leatherman multi-tool hanging off your belt is a great way to stay prepared for emergencies, but it means you look like someone with a Leatherman hanging off their belt—and that part’s not so great. This innocuous hair clip is a better alternative. It manages to replicate the functionality of quite a few tools, but will all but disappear when used to keep your bangs at bay.

It can serve as a flat-head screwdriver, even for fixing those tiny screws on your glasses. It’s got a 5/16 wrench for tackling the occasional bolt, and there’s a serrated edge for hacking through rope, but hopefully not hacking through your hair when worn. It could very well be the smallest multi-tool you can buy for just $10, trumped only by the Q-Tip when it comes to cost versus functionality.

(via wormstached-misha)

dragonturgy:

Why does one of Simba’s hammock-vines only have one side?  The middle one doesn’t go back up to the branch.

dragonturgy:

Why does one of Simba’s hammock-vines only have one side?  The middle one doesn’t go back up to the branch.

(via 01012012)

schrodingersowen:

important headcanons to consider:

  • can they use chopsticks
  • what do they do when they cant sleep
  • what would they impulse buy at the grocery store
  • what order do they wash things in the shower
  • what’s their coffee order
  • what sort of apps would they have on their smartphone
  • how do they act around children
  • what would they watch on tv when they’re bored and nothing they really like is on

(via willsollace)

queensarrow:

J.R. Ramirez joins the ‘Arrow’ cast as Ted Grant a.k.a 'Wildcat'
In Arrow, Grant will be a former boxer who now owns a gym for underprivileged youth. A man with a mysterious past, he will play a pivotal role in Laurel Lance’s arc this season.

(via mattiefairchild)

david-tennant-in-the-tardis:

cognitivedissonance:

couple-a-hundred-of-em:

As a college student, currently really hungry with nothing to eat, I understand how hard it can be to get food. Sometimes you really just don’t have the money to eat and when you do, you waste it all on fast food instead of stocking up on cheap things because you’re so tired of Ramen Noodes and canned food you could barf. So, I’ve composed a list of recipes and resources that will fit a college kid’s budget and appetite. Don’t go hungry! <3
Ramen Noodle Recipes:
Ramen Noodle Stir Fry
Sirloin-Snap Pea Stir Fry
Chicken Noodle Soup
Chili Cheese Ramen
Egg Drop Ramen
Spinach and Ramen
Ramen Spaghetti
Ramen Alfredo
Cheesy Ramen Noodles
Mug Meals:
Cheesy Eggs Mug
Cheese and Broccoli Mug
Mac and Cheese in a Mug
Meatloaf in a Mug
Nutella Mug Cake
Cheesecake Mug
Coffee Cup Quiche
Coffee Cup Chilaquiles
Mug Egg Scramble
Microwave Recipes:
Potato Chips
Corn on the cob
Scalloped Potatoes
White Rice
Fried Rice
Baked Potato
Chicken Casserole 
Garlic Chicken
Chicken Soup Casserole
Caramelized Onion Baked Potato
Soft Chicken Tacos
Pancakes
Recipe Generators
My Fridge Food
Fire House Chef
Dinner in 15 Minutes
Advanced recipe Generator
Cuisine
Recipe Matcher
Super Cook
Recipe Puppy
Cook Thing
Recipes by Ingredient
Recipe Key
Not Beans Again
Ideas 4 Recipes
Big Oven
Other Resources
Actual College Student Cookbook
Restaurant Coupons [1] [2] [3] [4]
Free Birthday food [1] [2] 

Just broke person in general masterpost…

david-tennant-in-the-tardis:

cognitivedissonance:

couple-a-hundred-of-em:

As a college student, currently really hungry with nothing to eat, I understand how hard it can be to get food. Sometimes you really just don’t have the money to eat and when you do, you waste it all on fast food instead of stocking up on cheap things because you’re so tired of Ramen Noodes and canned food you could barf. So, I’ve composed a list of recipes and resources that will fit a college kid’s budget and appetite. Don’t go hungry! <3

Ramen Noodle Recipes:

Mug Meals:

Microwave Recipes:

Recipe Generators

Other Resources

Just broke person in general masterpost…

(Source: i-only-speak-to-sailors, via dollyriot)

Myers Briggs By Superpowers

readingontheroof:

INFJ: Visions of the future
ESTP: Superhuman strength
INTJ: Immortality
ESFP: Ability to freeze time
INFP: Literary manipulation
ESTJ: Power negation
INTP: Omniscience
ESFJ: Healing powers
ISFJ: Visions of the past
ENTP: Dimensional travel
ISTJ: Photographic memory
ENFP: Reality warping
ISFP: Shape shifting
ENTJ: Mind control
ISTP: Invulnerability
ENFJ: Empathic powers

(via smallnico)

(Source: ohsodirnty, via dollyriot)

scienceofsarcasm:

Evening Post: August 12, 1899.
"She immediately alighted, caught hold of the astonished youth, and gave him a sound thrashing, using her fists in a scientific fashion…”

I would love to know what this means.

(via dollyriot)